The Farmer And The Old Lady

A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn’t do it while he

waited, so he said he didn’t live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the

hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and

picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a

problem – how to carry his entire purchases home. While he was scratching his head he was

approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, ‘Can you tell me how to get

to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?’ The farmer said, ‘Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close

to that house I would Walk you there but I can’t carry this lot.’ The old lady suggested, ‘Why

don’t you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under

each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?’ ‘Why, thank you very much,’ he said and

proceeded to walk the old girl home. On the way he says, ‘Let’s take my short cut and go down

this alley. We’ll be there in no time.’ The little old lady looked him over cautiously then

said, ‘I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the

alley you won’t hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?’ The

farmer said, ‘Holy smokes lady! I’m carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a

goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?’ The old lady

replied, ‘Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and

I’ll hold the chickens.’