A Man Who Drank Alot Was Told By His Wife

A man who drank alot was told by his wife “If you ever

come home drunk again, I’m going to le**e y*u”.

Regardless, that night he went out to a pub and drank a lot

and was sick all over his shirt. He told his friend, “If I

go home like this my wife will le**e me”. His friend said,

“I tell you what, put a twenty-pound note in your inside

jacket pocket, go home and show it to her and tell her

somebody threw-up over you and he gave you the money for the

dry-cleaning bill”. He goes home and his wife’s angry at

the state of him and tells him she is leaving, but he says,

“No, no, no, somebody was sick on me and he put a

twenty-pound note in my jacket pocket for the dry-cleaning

bill”. His wife digs into his jacket pocket and pulls out

some money. “Then why have you got two twenty-pound notes

in there?” “Oh, the other is from the man who shat in my

pants”